Room mates?

[SeaJay]

So, I haven't really heard of it happening, but it just occurred to me that it is possible we could be placed with room mates when being assigned housing. I know ESID, but is this a situation that has happened in the past? Is it something that is fairly normal? Or sort of rare?

I ask because I really would rather not have a room mate while living in Japan. Part of the reason why I want to join the JET program is because I want to teach my self to be (fairly) self-sufficient in a foreign country. I know there will most likely be other JETs in my area that I can go to if I need support, but if I had a room mate I'd probably automatically be a little too dependent on them.

Also, I've never had a good time living with room mates. I like my alone time and like to be able to choose when I want to be social. I've lived by myself for three years and its absolutely glorious.

I mean, if I did get placed with a room mate I'm not going to make a huge stink and it definitely wouldn't deter me from going (if I'm so lucky to get into the program.) I just wanna know the chances?

[word]

I've never heard of anyone who was ever placed with a roommate (not permanently, anyway; I have heard of temporary situations). I can't say that it has never or will never happen, but... I've never heard about it. Being isolated (I am about 30 minutes from the next nearest ALT) is far, far more common. Everyone in my prefecture lives alone (or, with an SO or something, not a roommate).

You'll share a hotel room in Tokyo with a couple of wankers when you first arrive, but that'll be over and done with soon enough. Then, odds are you'll be on your own for the rest of the year.

[tracey86]

don't quote me on this, but i'm sure i read something (maybe on ithinkimlost), about someone who lived in one of those shared teacher accommodation things. they had their own room, but maybe shared kitchen facilities or something? i've only heard that once though so i think it's very rare, the majority get their own small apartment. i've never heard of anyone sharing with a room mate.

[AVN]

I've never heard of this happening ever. With some of the other "for profit" companies it happens but not for JET. With JET you're often in teacher housing or an apartment and also unless you're in a big city you'll probably be the only ALT in your area for that CO.

The closest I know of is Sapporo. In Sapporo there is a group of ALTs, I don't remember how many but a lot, who live in the same apartment building. I've heard that even though they all have their own private place it's a lot like living in an international dorm and that this can sometimes be good and sometimes be bad depending on what you want out of your time in Japan.

[Siyris]

I haven't ever heard of this... The closest I've heard of are situations like mine, where you live in a teacher's apartment building where there is a shared genkan (shoe place) and possibly a shared tub-room (though I've never heard of a JET having to share a shower room), or of a number of ALTs being given apartments in the same building. Only exception I've heard of is with married couples who are placed together and live in the same apartment, but that's not really a roommate thing, that's a family thing.

Can't say for sure, but I've never heard of it happening.

[nicklar]

I don't think sharing accommodation would happen BUT as alluded to by others there is always a possibility of teacher housing. My predecessors, if you can believe this, lived in the dormitory of the local chemical and cement company! This involved one's own room but shared bathroom, meals, etc. Fortunately I managed to get myself an apartment - which was owned by the same company. The town thought single males couldn't cope by themselves (a typical Japanese perspective). They were quite shocked when they found out I could cook, clean, iron, wash, etc. My successors now live in new teacher housing which is self-contained - just a shared entrance.

[Lianwen]

I only know one person that shared with another person, but it was temporary/voluntary, and only for a few days.

[SeaJay]

Thank you so much everyone! That makes me even more excited. I think it would be a wonderful experience to live on my own in Japan. I forgot most JETs aren't placed in the same city with others; it makes sense that a roommate situation never happens, haha.

Thank you again!

[word]

[Siyris]

Thank you so much everyone! That makes me even more excited. I think it would be a wonderful experience to live on my own in Japan. I forgot most JETs aren't placed in the same city with others; it makes sense that a roommate situation never happens, haha.

Thank you again!

Not to sound dark or anything... but be careful with thinking that way. Yes, it's really awesome to live on your own in another country, be self sufficient, have your own apartment, blah, blah, blah.

BUT!
There are times where living on your own sucks. When you get lonely and sad, and you really want some company. There are times when your apartment gets so gross you don't know what to do about it but you really don't feel like cleaning, or times when your laundry piles up to the point that it stresses you out. There are times when you forgot to go grocery shopping and you have to eat a package of ebi-senbei for dinner because you don't have anything else, and there are times when you are the only one in the apartment building and it feels like you're the only one in the entire world.

My point is, don't go into JET thinking everything will be 'a wonderful experience' and that it will be a happy la-la-land. There is a lot that is amazing and fantastic and wonderful and perfect about living in Japan... but there is a lot that sucks too... and if you come into it thinking that everything will always be happy, you will end up being miserable when it turns out not to be true. Look forward to the amazing experiences, but also be honest with yourself and recognize that it won't always be good.

[darlo]

There are times where living on your own sucks. When you get lonely and sad, and you really want some company. There are times when your apartment gets so gross you don't know what to do about it but you really don't feel like cleaning, or times when your laundry piles up to the point that it stresses you out. There are times when you forgot to go grocery shopping and you have to eat a package of ebi-senbei for dinner because you don't have anything else, and there are times when you are the only one in the apartment building and it feels like you're the only one in the entire world.

Especially if you're in the countryside!

[upcycledbliss]

I would like to add that living on your own and not being in college is different than being in college and having your own place. College gives you a list of groups and activities and support if something goes wrong. There is usually campus security is you live on or near campus. There are a bunch of people your age with similar interests already put together. Outside of college thwre are a lot of things too, but ussually not organized or the same age or nearby or safe. You have to be more independent and make things happen to yourself. I have lived in places where people in my age range mostly didn't exist and because of that most activities are for older people or children. In Japan I suppose it to be worst because the language and foreigner barriers.

But, maybe you already are out of school and know this, I don't know. Either way its something I wish someone would have explained to me before graduating.

[rollins]

I would like to add that living on your own and not being in college is different than being in college and having your own place. College gives you a list of groups and activities and support if something goes wrong. There is usually campus security is you live on or near campus. There are a bunch of people your age with similar interests already put together. Outside of college thwre are a lot of things too, but ussually not organized or the same age or nearby or safe. You have to be more independent and make things happen to yourself. I have lived in places where people in my age range mostly didn't exist and because of that most activities are for older people or children. In Japan I suppose it to be worst because the language and foreigner barriers.

But, maybe you already are out of school and know this, I don't know. Either way its something I wish someone would have explained to me before graduating.

Good words here, although for many, it's something you don't really realize until it happens. It's hard enough having to learn about life after college in your own country, but doing it with the added challenge of doing it in Japan does break a few new ALTs every year. For some outside the range of big cities, your only group is going to be fellow ALTs, which can be good or bad depending on the makeup of the group.

To the original point, I can't say I've ever heard of a room mate situation myself. As said before, the closest you'll probably get is sharing the same apartment building. One of high school ALTs in my area lives in the teacher neighborhood with the other high school teachers but still with their own personal space.

[SeaJay]

Oh! Don't worry about me, I'm not all sunshine and giggles over here. I've been having some very uneasy feelings about the program in general the more I read about experiences and into the depths of the forums. That doesn't mean that I don't want to do it anymore, but I definitely am more aware of somethings having to do with the job requirement and where you are placed.

Annnnd (I hate to be a tad bit snippy, but it's something that rubs me the wrong way when people assume...) I don't really need a reality check when it comes to living alone.

I only lived in campus housing my freshmen year of college and it was only that summer that I returned to my hometown. Sophomore year I lived with room mates and it ended badly. By June 1st I was in my own apartment, paying all my own bills and working a part time job on top of classes. In June I will have lived here three years. In May I will have lived here as a big girl out of college with a full time job for one year. Yes, I know that the laundry piles up, the chores don't get as done easily. There are some nights of endless loneliness. But honestly, I much prefer being on my own when I'm at home. I ADORE social interaction and yes, I do miss it a whole bunch when there is no one available to hang out. But I live through it.

That being said. YES, I'm fully aware that living on your own in an entirely different country with an entirely different language I don't have the biggest grasp on will be a completely different animal. There will be many, many, many hard things I'll have to encounter and probably a few nights of bursting into tears out of pure frustration. But I'm a firm believer in "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger." because I've definitely experienced that phenomenon many times in my life.

And it's a big reason why I want the JET programme so badly. I adore Japan and have for almost my whole life, so it has always been a dream to at least visit and I also am really interested in seeing English through the eyes of non-native speakers. But, I feel I still have a lot of growing and maturing to do and I think this programme will help a lot with that. I need more life experience. Even though I've lived on my own for three years with jobs and bills and all that, I've never been COMPLETELY on my own. I've always had family/friends close by to lend a hand. I want to learn how to be completely self-sufficient.

Obviously, I want to learn that the hard way. Haha.

[upcycledbliss]

I have never really depended on roommates I guess. I don't understand that thought. in fact, in general in life since I have been on my own since 18 (a decade I September) far away from unsupportive family, I have realized learning how to depend on and trust in people and to set boundaries that are good for both people in relationship to be hardest. I have realized that I can get so much more out if life that way. Everyone's different but since we don't know you we have to assume something. I understand feeling people think you are incompetent and say silly things (like about laundry) if you read the pet thread I had the same problem. But I suppose some of it was my fault for not giving my details and some is everyone has different life experience. For instance, the last 5 years I have been out of school varied a lot. When I was in the middle of no where swamp land Florida where the only people my age had 3 kids and the average age was in the 50s I really would have liked a roommate. In downtown Orlando I would have liked a roommate to share expenses and have a safe person to walk back from bars with, where I am now is next to a park and near a lot of things and activities geared to my age and I am older and I enjoy living alone but I am friends with a lot of my neighbors. I don't think living alone is easier or harder nor do I think that you learn more alone, what you learn is different. I understand wanting to learn to live alone in a foreign country. I am traveling solo with or without jet around the world for a few years. I want to do what I want and don't know anyone crazy enough to do it with me. Though I know I will spend some time living with other people.

And I have mostly had good roommate experiences with people I am not friends with. Much easier. Not sure if yours was with friends or not but I had a horrible experience that way. I kind of miss roommates though so take it for what its worth. Teacher housing sounds nice. I think this is because I don't have family support, my friends have been my family for a long time. Learning to make my own ever changing family has been hardest. Knowing you are never really their actual family and that spouses and kids change everything has been hardest, especially since I am not big on long term romantic relationships. I have learned a lot sure, there certain things I could have done without learning first hand . Its hard when there is no one there when disaster strikes. No one to check on you (locally) or who have a family to check on first, then you. Hurricanes taught me that. No dad to come and fix moldy things, or broken things. The occasional, if I die I wonder how long it would take for someone to find out gets to me, more in the past I have a strong network of friends who if they dont hear from me will probably send a search party. Plus now I don't live on ocean or in swamp. Not as scary.

I in no way think this relates to you directly, just general information that may or may not be helpful. It's just my perspective. I am also not saying living alone is bad or makes you unhappy or assuming anything about you. I grew up in the middle of nowhere (population 200 in nearest village) in Michigan and my parents worked from 5 am to 8 pm a lot so we were rather independent and we didn't get along a lot. Being raised in a city with closer family would surely give a different perspective. As would a myriad of other experiences. For instance, you working through college to support yourself is probably much different than many others. it doesn't mean their perspective is not helpful though.

Sorry this is so long, I do value getting detailed accounts of experience instead of advice. you might not. This isn't the same as experience in Japan but my experience living alone. I have lived in Michigan, florida, south Carolina, and Boston. Michigan writh family Florida with college and jobs, and the others through summer research programs at other university in provided campus housing paid by grants.