Enkai wa takai!

[Nausicaablue]

Is it just me or are there other JETs out there who can't afford to go to enkai? I went to the first one at my base school for around 4000 but since then the price has gone up to at least 7000 yen each time. I feel like it's rude of me to refuse but my supervisor seems understanding, I just don't know if the other teachers are. I'm here with my spouse and have loan payments back home so I don't have much spare money every month. Now I've had to refuse a post-graduation enkai and a one night onsen trip with the other English teachers (at 15000 yen!) and I really feel torn. I know these events are socially important and I don't want to come across as stand-offish. I could afford to go to one of these but it would make things really tight until next payday, and I live pretty thriftily as it is!

I guess my question is - how important have people found going to enkai to be in the overall scheme of work relations, and, if it were you, would you go to the onsen night or the overall enkai?

[word]

Is it just me or are there other JETs out there who can't afford to go to enkai? I went to the first one at my base school for around 4000 but since then the price has gone up to at least 7000 yen each time. I feel like it's rude of me to refuse but my supervisor seems understanding, I just don't know if the other teachers are. I'm here with my spouse and have loan payments back home so I don't have much spare money every month. Now I've had to refuse a post-graduation enkai and a one night onsen trip with the other English teachers (at 15000 yen!) and I really feel torn. I know these events are socially important and I don't want to come across as stand-offish. I could afford to go to one of these but it would make things really tight until next payday, and I live pretty thriftily as it is!

I guess my question is - how important have people found going to enkai to be in the overall scheme of work relations, and, if it were you, would you go to the onsen night or the overall enkai?

I was in a similar situation during my first two years. Now that MG is working, I can afford to go to a lot more of 'em. I can't really say for certain how important attendance is; if you're a good ALT and a likeable person, it probably won't really matter, and they'll understand if you don't go. If it were me, I'd probably go and then, later, wish that I hadn't.

This may be one of those things that makes BoEs prefer ALTs without dependents (as I mentioned in another thread).

[Gizmotech]

Hmm.

I skipped out on Christmas which was a big overnight event. I didn't feel like spending the 1.5man to go eat, sit around naked in a big indoor wading pool, and then sleep in shared accommodations.

However, I did just pay 6k for the graduation enkai, and the English department will have their own around the 16th of the month which is covered from the monthly money they get from me (2k/month into a big pot for the English teachers).

No one said anything to me about bailing on the Christmas enkai, and work relations didn't seem to suffer.

[stephanieh]

In my experience, teachers are pretty understanding if you can't make it to an enkai. Last year, I had to miss two enkais because I was out of town, and it hasn't affected my relationship with the teachers. If you explain that money is tight, they are probably going to sympathise. If you're afraid your not going is going to hender your relationships, make a big deal about how you would love to go, and how much fun it should be.

If I were you, I would try to go to the graduation enkai. It might be one of the last enkais you get with the current staff considering many of them could be at different schools in April.

[OdysseyOfNoises]

7000 yen for an enkai is pretty reasonable. My year-end enkai last year was approaching almost 12000 yen (I didn't go).

[trout501]

Is it just me or are there other JETs out there who can't afford to go to enkai? I went to the first one at my base school for around 4000 but since then the price has gone up to at least 7000 yen each time. I feel like it's rude of me to refuse but my supervisor seems understanding, I just don't know if the other teachers are. I'm here with my spouse and have loan payments back home so I don't have much spare money every month. Now I've had to refuse a post-graduation enkai and a one night onsen trip with the other English teachers (at 15000 yen!) and I really feel torn. I know these events are socially important and I don't want to come across as stand-offish. I could afford to go to one of these but it would make things really tight until next payday, and I live pretty thriftily as it is!

I guess my question is - how important have people found going to enkai to be in the overall scheme of work relations, and, if it were you, would you go to the onsen night or the overall enkai?

I was in a similar situation during my first two years. Now that MG is working, I can afford to go to a lot more of 'em. I can't really say for certain how important attendance is; if you're a good ALT and a likeable person, it probably won't really matter, and they'll understand if you don't go. If it were me, I'd probably go and then, later, wish that I hadn't.

This may be one of those things that makes BoEs prefer ALTs without dependents (as I mentioned in another thread).

I'm sorry for being off-topic, but I've got to ask this because I see this abbreviation in almost every single one of word's posts, and from this post it looks like this MG thing is a fairly lucrative source of beer money so I'm curious.

Word,
What is MG???? I have never heard this abbreviation before in my life. Some kind of online stock trading site?

[KIKKI.K]

MG means "my girl" apparently... :p
because people got sick of him saying "my girl" all the time lol

[word]

MG means "my girl" apparently... :p
because people got sick of him saying "my girl" all the time lol

Yep. Coincidentally, those are also her initials.*


*May or may not be true.

[Antonath]

My base school's enkais are usually around 5000, but having no dependents, car to run, or debts back home, I have no issue paying for them.

Enkais are rather weird in terms of relationships with other teachers. "What happens at the enkai stays at the enkai", basically. Even if you make great friends with a teacher who's ignored you from day one, chances are they'll be ignoring you again the next day. It's worth trying to get to a few, though; big ones like New Year, leaving enkais for teachers in March / April, or English department get-togethers are the best to aim for. Department enkais are often a little cheaper, too.

[AVN]

My base school's enkais are usually around 5000, but having no dependents, car to run, or debts back home, I have no issue paying for them.

Enkais are rather weird in terms of relationships with other teachers. "What happens at the enkai stays at the enkai", basically. Even if you make great friends with a teacher who's ignored you from day one, chances are they'll be ignoring you again the next day. It's worth trying to get to a few, though; big ones like New Year, leaving enkais for teachers in March / April, or English department get-togethers are the best to aim for. Department enkais are often a little cheaper, too.

Man I envy all you guys with department enkais.

[pnksweater]

I work at multiple schools and there’s an enkai going on pretty much all the time. If I went to all of them I’d have to sell a kidney. I felt pretty guilty until I talked with some of the other part time teachers. They, like us, are on a different pay scale from the regular, full time teachers. And for them, it’s too expensive, too. The result is, they don’t come to enkais all that much. As far as I can tell, there is no bad blood between them and the other staff. I go when I can, and I rotate schools so that I get at least one enkai in with each school each year… but I don’t sweat it too much.

[isitatomic]

As with most things involving work/social relations, just be considerate and pick your battles wisely. If you are a stellar or just plain decent JET, I think it would be absurd if other folks thought negatively of you for imperfect get-drunk-and-party attendance. I had to change from a 7 year vegan diet to a not always vegetarian one, and at first I told other teachers I'd be willing to duck out of enkais and teacher housing parties to save them the meal planning trouble. In the end though, they really bend over backwards to cut out meats and whatnot and insist that I come. I haven't regretted attending a single enkai, and I can guarantee I wouldn't be anywhere near as close to some coworkers as I am now if I hadn't gone.

Do what you can afford, take your leave whenever you need. Personally, I think you'd be cutting yourself out of some genuinely good times if you decided to just skip them altogether!

[ladama]

Enkais are rather weird in terms of relationships with other teachers. "What happens at the enkai stays at the enkai", basically. Even if you make great friends with a teacher who's ignored you from day one, chances are they'll be ignoring you again the next day. It's worth trying to get to a few, though; big ones like New Year, leaving enkais for teachers in March / April, or English department get-togethers are the best to aim for. Department enkais are often a little cheaper, too.

+1 to this. Once in a while a teacher would be a bit more chatty with me at school, but usually, no matter how much I talked to a teacher at an enkai, it was back to barely acknowledging my existence on Monday, maybe a slightly more emphatic "ohayou gozaimasu" when I came in, but that would be about it. "What happens at enkai stays at enkai" is a good way to put it.
I still went to the majority of enkais and I always had a good time (or at least I never had a bad time), but I didn't stress too much if I skipped the enkai for whatever reason.

[Namisuke]

Enkais are rather weird in terms of relationships with other teachers. "What happens at the enkai stays at the enkai", basically. Even if you make great friends with a teacher who's ignored you from day one, chances are they'll be ignoring you again the next day. It's worth trying to get to a few, though; big ones like New Year, leaving enkais for teachers in March / April, or English department get-togethers are the best to aim for. Department enkais are often a little cheaper, too.

+1 to this. Once in a while a teacher would be a bit more chatty with me at school, but usually, no matter how much I talked to a teacher at an enkai, it was back to barely acknowledging my existence on Monday, maybe a slightly more emphatic "ohayou gozaimasu" when I came in, but that would be about it. "What happens at enkai stays at enkai" is a good way to put it.
I still went to the majority of enkais and I always had a good time (or at least I never had a bad time), but I didn't stress too much if I skipped the enkai for whatever reason.

+2! I am not unpopular at school or anything, but obviously people talk a lot more when they are drunk or stuck with you in an onsen...lol I still enjoy going to enkais regardless of this because I get to practice some Japanese, sing karaoke, joke around with everyone, and learn how people like to relax in Japan. At my main school we have a party fund that we have to put money into. It is 3000 yen a month, so it is easier to pay for. My visiting school also has parties, but I am usually booked up with classes when I go and am too busy to chat with people (and I sit too dang far away from anyone anyways), so it isn't going to destroy my reputation there if I don't go. Theirs are usually expensive too. So, from all of the evidence on here, it isn't going to kill you to not go. I don't think they usually stop inviting you either as it is a work party and not a personal one (invitations seem somewhat mandatory in a sense, especially if they hand out flyers). Being a travelling ALT can definitely hinder your chances at getting the opportunity to go to an enkai. Everyone should try to go to at least one, but you don't have to go to all of them. Other teachers opt out sometimes too or choose to go home early.

[Laurel]

So far, when I ask about money for them they always say " It's OK, I don't think ALT has to pay".
Even though this answer is pleasing to me, surely there is something wrong with it. Maybe when I leave, they will bill me for all of them haha!